While browsing Xanga because it's much more entertaining than the mindless drivel that is studying for a very important exam which everyone knows you are going to fail in, I happened to stumble upon an argument by some Xangians about some topic which slightly amused me as shown below:
Yeah, look at the awesome smirk, even though the arguments provided by some people were stupid.
(Fuck I'm too lazy to use MSPaint/Photoshop. I'm too lazy to draw my own pics too. Please bear with me while this blog continues on.)
Either way, the question was this.
If the hypothetical event that one with a group of friends would get stuck in a cave and the only exit was blocked by a massive cave in, what would you do?*Insert massive unrelated story here*
So one sunny day a medium-sized mob sat about the commerce building idling away their lives because of incoming exams or arranged marriages. You know, where all the cool people hang out and such.
The tension of idleness had gotten to some people (or person), as shown in the picture below:
Clearly it has caused some people (or person) to grow a mullet in quick time also.
This of course prompted the defacto leader of the group, thereby known as A. Chong (or Aaron C. if you like) to propose an event for the rest of the group to decide upon in a democratic format i.e. everyone abstaining from the vote and the proposal passing through by default.
Aaron: Let's go cave exploring guys!
Retarded ideas most of the time come from retarded people. The response was the standard murmurs from the majority of the group. The rest were shaking their heads in disbelief that some guy had the nerve to suggest such an idea.
Sweet girl with a mouth too big for her own good (let's call her Jaja for example): Don't we have better things to do? Don't you have better things to do?
Aaron: Like?
Jaja: Chinese. Look at your stupid translations.
Everyone: ....
Either way, no-one could resist the undeniable charms of Aaron Chong and his bowlcut. They cannot break the fundimental rule that holds the universe together...The Law of the Bowlcut. It means that once a person with a bowlcut makes a decision no-one can technically challenge him because nothing benificial penetrates that thick bowlcut of his. Hence they all decided to go explore a cave that was conviently situated right beside the commerce building.
How fucking convient.
Either way Aaron and his group entered the cave ignoring the obvious danger sign planted right in front of the entrance. Obvious stupidity is obvious.
Only QMB stayed outside. His common senses were tingling.
Meanwhile in the northern hemisphere...
Who the fuck is the leader of Malaysia?
Obvious joke is obvious.
Result? Massive cave in, group trapped inside and QMB outside with this expression on his face:
Yep. Plothax ftw.
Back inside the cave, where it is all dark and no-one could see anything beyond six centimetres a poor intelligent little girl with no sense of direction (since we need to give all these people a name, let's stick with Winnie for simplicity's sake) decided to attempt a phone call even though it was impossible to get a phone signal through metres of thick rock.
Winnie: Come on, come on...
Meanwhile, everyone was just staring in her general direction (or at least they thought they were) of her trying to figure out what the hell she was doing.
Winnie: ...yes, I got through even though it is impossible to get a signal! IT MUST BE THE WORK OF JEBUS! PRAISE JEBUS!
Of course, she just had to meet a bloody end by a some tank by the name of Andric smashing her by the back of the head with a giant rock. Blood and brains splattered everywhere. Not a pretty sight, but yeah that's what you get for defying simple logic if you're not the author of this post.
Andric: Well, that shut her up.
Anyway, after defeating the evil annoying witch known as Winnie, Andric proceeds to pick up the phone Winnie still had in her cold dead hand and proceeded to find out who the hell she was calling.
Phone:
I'm sorry, but Nunally-sama and the rest of the Code Geass Rangers are busy saving the world from brutal dictators using magical powers to control humanity's will for freedom and oil. Also, we are defending ourselves against the Hague for the use of a simple bomb codenamed "FLEIJA" which poses no risk towards innocent civilians as proven by unreliable and invalid experiments we have conducted over the last hour or so. Thanks for calling us and we have sent you a wallpaper to your phone as thanks for calling the Code Geass Rangers hotline.Andric: I see...
Yes, yes you do. Even though the Code Geass plot was kinda hilarious to begin with, you just had to ruin it, didn't you? Either way, looking foward to the trainwreck that is Code Geass R2 and this blog.
Back to the story, as Andric was like the strongest person there and had no qualms about killing random people for his own survival and since everyone was technically blind due to the lack of light sources, he either snapped the victim's head in half or bashed the victim's face in with the same rock he used to shut Winnie up.
Andric: Fuck, I can't make a fucking BBQ. I should've came prepared.
Random voice in Andric's head: Like this?
Andric: Yeah, kinda like that. Oh well...
And so that's how Andric became a Cannibal. Of course the plothax gods couldn't leave Andric stuck in the cave all alone without food or water, so here comes...
Breaking through the logically-impossible-to-break rocks and shoving daylight down Andric's throat.
Andric: HOLY CRAP, WHY IS THERE SO MUCH CODE GEASS HAX! Get some better anime will ya?
QMB: Yeah, that's like the only decent anime I have on my HD at the moment. Anyway let's ditch to Galaxy World and fuck around with Virtua Tennis 3!
And so the two skipped off into the sunset living happily ever after holding each others hand.
The End.
Moral of the story? Plot hax, nice random pictures and Code Geass make a shitty story enjoyable. Sadly I didn't bother with Kallen or C.C. shots.
And yes, thanks for reading. Here's something to amuse you.
Comments (7)
talk about spontaneity+boredom
zomg hax
Love the translations
I want to be the Knight of Zero!
so those anima stills were 'hax' I was going to ask if they were from Yugioh!
This entry amazed me, hence why I added you as a friend.Â
Viva!